I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
