You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Betty ford says i'm here all night
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
be right there i have to get my cape
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
