Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Randomize
