I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
