It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
