I bet he comes in French.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
MIDGETS
????
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize