he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
