I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
My pussy is not your playground.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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