Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
