areolas are like halos for boobs.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I forget how to act sober
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
