let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I want to fling myself into the sun
Randomize
