Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
