it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
babies were throwing up all over the place
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
