we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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