1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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