she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
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