My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Randomize
