You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I wear drunk well.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
