Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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