she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Randomize
