doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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