"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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