Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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