lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
