So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
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