I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Man, jail baloney is awful.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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