there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
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