If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
If I die, sorry about rent.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
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