found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
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