he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
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