Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Randomize
