3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
