somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Are we still banned from the library?
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
