Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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