what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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