the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
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