Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Randomize
