Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Randomize
