i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
