Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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