You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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