Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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