I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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