I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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