Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
