i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
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