party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
