I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
