I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
