You really coming over, don't trick.
Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
