I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
