Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
